In my nursing career I have seen a lot of hurt and pain and you have to do nothing but turn on the news or open a twitter feed to feel it all around us.  It is easy to get sucked in and get angry back.  That is exactly what the angry person wants.  They feel really bad and they want others to feel bad too.  What they likely don’t understand is what would make them feel better is not for someone else to hurt, but for someone else to acknowledge their pain, fear or despair.  Everyone, at our core, just want to be seen. to know that someone recognizes who we are and what we are going through.  In my diabetes life, there have definitely been times when I was angry at the situation and when people tried to cheer me up, it made it worse.  Why?  Because they didn’t “see me”.  They didn’t see my hurt.  I am quite sure I have lashed out a bit, until one time a year or so after my diagnosis someone said “I am really sorry you have to deal with all this alone”.   Eureka!  It felt so wonderful that someone “got” me.  I immediately felt better.  So if you are on either side of that hurting equation consider what the other person really needs or what you really need.  Take action to help.