Do you have diabetes and feel like you have disappeared?  Me too!!  I get it!  Before diabetes, my voice carried weight and people listened.  As a nurse, I felt the respect of doctors and nurses I worked with.  If I called to notify someone about an important situation with a patient, there was never a question of my integrity.  But when my pancreas checked out, I felt my credibility slip.

Good enough?

After diabetes, when I couldn’t do it perfectly, I felt judged.  Those once friendly faces, now raised an eyebrow, at my lack of perfection.  When I tried to explain my challenges and the difficulties, my errors were pointed out with instructions to correct the problems “or else”.  People reminded me of blindness, kidney failure, amputation, stroke or any other of the various deadly complications diabetes would inflict.  OKay!! I got it!!  Fear was effectively instilled!!  But my best seemed inadequate. Somehow, my nursing background and education were supposed to be “enough” for me to make all these changes.  My voice faded into oblivion when perfection was not achieved.

Hey!  I am right here!

I felt invisible as providers discussed my ‘case’ right in front of me as if I didn’t exist.  They analyzed my data,  measured my progress, and set my goals, as I sat by.  At work, my voice had authority and credibility when speaking about others, but when I slipped into a patient role, I was silenced by many of those experts whose help I sought.

I needed them to treat me as a knowledgeable expert of my own care, but it didn’t happen  My need for flexibility and autonomy conflicted with their needs for outcomes and results.   My life became a statistic that measured their effectiveness as a provider.  My needs and my voice disappeared in a system that was trying to solve the puzzle of diabetes.

Communication

Along the way, I remembered I was in control of my life and had choices.   My voice mattered. Then things changed.   The balance of power shifted my way when I refused to be a cog in the machine.  I found providers that recognized my needs for wellness, instead of their need to report data.  My voice strengthened and my confidence soared. Instead of feeling like a list of “problems”, I remembered I was  a person who had value and purpose.   Even if every blood sugar I ever checked was not perfect, that was not the point!  The point was that I was trying my best every day.  Having a voice means that someone is listening. Communication is a two-way process.  Not information to be pushed from your doctor to you, but an exchange between two experts.  You – the expert on what you need, know, feel and believe, and your provider the expert on the care of diabetes.

Reappearing

Where are you ?  Have you disappeared and gotten lost in the land of diabetes?   Are you ready to show up and be heard?   There are some tips and tricks that can help.  Check out my webinar this Wednesday or sign up for a a free 30 minute call to learn more.  I figured it out and I want to spread the word!    Never lose YOUR voice!  You matter!

Best,

Patricia